# Ask one more question

> They mentioned their week was rough. You said "same" and told them about yours. Ten minutes later they'd gone quiet and you weren't sure why.

[Read on lets-talk](https://talk.kensaur.us/notes/one-more-question)

## Pattern

A follow-up question — one that picks up the last thing they said — is the cheapest proof that you were listening. It shows you want their version, not a turn to talk. One good follow-up beats three new topics.

## Cite

Across live chats and first-meeting conversations, people who asked more questions — especially follow-ups — were liked more, because they came across as more responsive (Huang, Yeomans, Brooks, Minson & Gino, 2017).

## Try this

- "Rough how — work stuff or people stuff?"
- "What part of it is still on your mind?"
- Echo one word they used: "You said 'drained' — drained like tired, or like done?"
- Wait for the answer before sharing your own story.

## Where it breaks

A string of questions with no warmth feels like an interview — or an interrogation mid-fight. Ask, then actually react to the answer.

## Who named this

- [Huang, Yeomans, Brooks, Minson & Gino](https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/28447835/) — It doesn't hurt to ask: Question-asking increases liking — Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2017